Ep 81 - Altruism

hi everyone welcome back to the psychology and spirituality a bridge to Better Life discussion I'm your host my name is Maran and with me again love to have you back yui Castro it is so so good to see you again so for those who do not know yud yudi is a clinical psychologist he's also spirit like me and a member of the conscious living Spirits group in North Miami in Florida um if this is the first time that you're watching this podcast um please note that our program the psychology and spirituality weekly talks are based on the works by Joan d'angeles and we're here to offer you offer us right Yi this space for us to maybe talk compare sift through concepts of spirituality as well as the psychological lens and how they they come together and uh doing so to to to really help us lead a better life that's the the ultimate goal for all of us please note our program sponsored by TV manelin the United States spiritual Federation the international spiritist Council and army Brazil but yudi how you doing I'm very good thank you so much that's awesome awesome to have you back so I was uh reading um about this subject I would like for us to talk today and uh found that last July just a a year ago Georgetown University published this article about the Neuroscience behind superhuman X of generosity and and that same article referenced a paper that was published before about the same subject and the paper and the article both shed light into why extreme alterists help strangers for no apparent reason no benefit nothing they just give because they do right there's no uh receipt of any type shape of form of benefit this study apparently is the first time to measure those so-called extreme altruist brain activity as they make those very very generous decisions in real time right but Yi why are we even talking about altruism today why do you think is it easy to be generous toward family and friends but not to strangers what are your thoughts yes uh that's an interesting uh conclusion for an article that you

about altruism today why do you think is it easy to be generous toward family and friends but not to strangers what are your thoughts yes uh that's an interesting uh conclusion for an article that you mentioned and to answer your question directly I would say at least from the psychological standpoint altruism there is a component of empathy of being able to connect with somebody that that that's experiencing some type of distress or that's in pain and everything so when we think about helping or connecting and be being able to enact some change in someone's life it's always easier for us to do that to those that we love to those that are close uh to us to those that live with us or or are around us uh and that could be family members could be friends could be the community so it's it's no surprise to me honestly that the this the study you know is saying that these people who are wired differently almost from a neurological standpoint because it is it is if we think about the component of empathy and having you know one thing that I remember from altruism from the psychological my psychological studies in the doctor program was there's three components to altruism is motive means an opportunity and this is interesting for us to think about and the motive here if we are talking about helping or becoming you know generous towards somebody that's close to us somebody that that we care about it's always way easier to do that than to do and then to become generous or uh engage in pro-social Behavior which is also another name for altruistic acts towards those that we don't know so the motive piece of this Triad let's called motive means an opportunity to engage in altruistic Behavior the motive piece is is more Salient in when we're talking about people that we know people that we love people we care about and it's funny that it's almost looks like you're talking about a detective series or police seral the what is it the the the motive the means and the opportunity okay

hat we love people we care about and it's funny that it's almost looks like you're talking about a detective series or police seral the what is it the the the motive the means and the opportunity okay altruistic Behavior yes I love it I love it I didn't coin that by the way this is this is like studies that have said that you need motive means and opportunity in know in order for altruistic Behavior uh to occur and I thought that was that was interesting that when absolutely so the motive you're talking about the motive being well I know you right and I see your pain I see your need let me do that versus the unknown but that research y talks about those uh those people um I think one example they give is to to give to donate a kidney voluntarily to a person Perfect Stranger right those are the so-called uh extreme altruist but uh if we see that this exists right this brain activity that they are indeed um researching have we come to this new paradigm that there are indeed some of us who genuinely cares about others regardless or flip the coin right or is the idea of the good sub Samaritan uh do remember the parable the Good Samaritan yes still so foreign to us 2,000 years after Jesus discussed um the so-called stranger on the road is this something still foreign was what what can we talk about it yudi and is there something that perhaps the works by Jonah d'angeles Can Shed light on the subject yes I think there's a couple different things that we can approach from for from what you mentioned the first one I think is when you're talking about the donation of kidneys it actually it actually reminded me of an article that I I read many years ago when they were researching the Neuroscience behind people who engage in these altruistic acts the super altruistic acts towards strangers and there was this one article that looked at the Neuroscience behind um kidney donators so there's in the US and at least this was in two 2016 there were 150 people people registered to donate kidneys to people

as this one article that looked at the Neuroscience behind um kidney donators so there's in the US and at least this was in two 2016 there were 150 people people registered to donate kidneys to people they don't know so they took they took these people to a lab hooked them up to F fmri machines and try to see their brain activities and all of that and even from a structural standpoint and uh through MRI and what they found was that there's this region or I guess this this little thing we have in our brains called the amydala which is a plum siiz thing almost shaped and this amydala it which is responsible for a lot of um has a big emotional component that plays a big emotional component in our brain in our neurochemistry and neuro you know neurobiology as well the amydala of those who are uh these super altruistic people they they are they are bigger and that compared to when they research people with Psy like Psychopathic Tendencies for instance their amig are smaller and less active and they found and this is super interesting because they found that these having these larger amygdalas there are more active translates directly into their altruistic Behavior because they can connect with people's um they can be more empathetic towards those that need a kidney that they don't even know they have you know this emotional component and stronger within them so they become more altruistic so even from a neurological standpoint from a structural standpoint of our brain we can already see that there are this these uh differences that we observe from you you know from people and going through the other side of the spectrum like sociopath or a psychopath versus somebody that's super altruistic that has everything to do with empathy uh their brains are different and that I think that's when you mentioned that study that made me think of that awesome this is this is super cool and um maybe maybe we can start or or continue this discussion of altruism can we perhaps Define it what is the What is the

ned that study that made me think of that awesome this is this is super cool and um maybe maybe we can start or or continue this discussion of altruism can we perhaps Define it what is the What is the definition what can we say we don't have to Define from a vocabulary uh or not a vocabul dictionary perspective but what can we say from a definition standpoint what is altruism what why Alis yes altruism or what they Cal social behavior at least I can give you a little bit of the psychological I guess not the dictionary definition I don't know that but the the the idea of you know helping someone else at one's uh helping someone else at some cost to oneself yes that is that's an idea at some cost to oneself and that's an idea that psychology explores a lot as far as you know altruistic or pro-social behavior being this you know empathetic act towards someone else and in helping them and often times when we think of help we think of people in distress and there's where the the amydala thing comes into place because seeing someone in distress generates an emotional reaction from us those who have more active and larger amigdalas that reaction is going to be even bigger therefore and more potent perhaps and that will propel them to become more altruistic to engaging these pro-social behaviors which are these acts towards others can can I say something that just came to my mind now Yi uh the definition says to be atristic is giv but there is a uh potentially negative impact right there's a sense of uh sacrifice perhaps and and that immediately put me to think about the when Jesus talks about the the the Widow's might right where she there's all those very rich people offering in in the temple and there's this little Widow that comes in and she puts two little coins and uh it it's quite uh I'm being silly here but pathetic right it's like oh what change does it do to you but we often forget that it's not about um a judgment of socioeconomic or sizes or anything but it's the fact that

uh I'm being silly here but pathetic right it's like oh what change does it do to you but we often forget that it's not about um a judgment of socioeconomic or sizes or anything but it's the fact that uh this in this case that woman as you know the collection in in the temple right people gave collection in the time of Jesus to exactly support women like this one have that are wiow and they need a a structure within the community otherwise uh the the woman and even the children would suffer tremendously so the idea that I receive Let's Pretend uh now that you are a donor right you're putting your your money there and the temple then disseminates distributes to people I'm one of the people so you give let's say a thousand I get 10 right I get 10 from from the the the the religious institution and then I give back to which means I really did that as my own sacrifice I'm doing because I can right and I I I I it really puts a Different Light to to to that uh Parable itself right that the uh narrative from Jesus but also to the idea for as f why do we do this why I know you talked about empathy yes but why um are there people and are we one of them that really um while losing and being impacted negatively still benefit from um acts of altruism and that's an interesting one too because even if we think you mentioned the the the Good Samaritan as well the story that was there was also cost involved there to the Widow there's also cost involved so they they they are in a way sacrificing and I love use that word sacrificing they are in a way both of them are sacrificing something that's going to help someone else and that there is a cost to them and the idea when there when he was comparing you know the Widow and everything and how much can someone give it goes back I think when you mentioned that made me think again of the motive means and opportunity having the means yeah to sacrifice yourself to to give what you have and and that is very relative what is it that you have what is it that that

made me think again of the motive means and opportunity having the means yeah to sacrifice yourself to to give what you have and and that is very relative what is it that you have what is it that that you can actually give right Abol yeah so I think it's very individual and it's it's super interesting because you mentioned the new paradigm in your in your when you're mentioning before like Are we more altruistic now what's going on I think if spiritism can bring light to that and the fact that we're transitioning the plan planet is going to the planetary transition um Society changing like we're all changing and there's there's these there's this accumulated knowledge perhaps that we have gathered throughout multiple you know the immortality of the Soul multiple reincarnations and we can think of that we're learning these things that are these as Jesus says the these Treasures that that no Thief can steal and and they don't accumulate rust the the true ones you know yeah yeah um can I go back to something you said um yeah sure you you mentioned that you love the word sacrifice right um and I specifically like that word as well but from a different perspective which is the root cause or the the root word sorry the root word for sacrifice is sacred right which really means divine and the sacrifice is by giving you attain a a level closer to God that that sense of becoming sacred becoming Divine becoming Godlike in in in who you are in your uh quote unquote right air quote here quote unquote uh um in your DNA and and I love that because perhaps uh for each one of us to think of this subject of altruism um and yes it generates empathy I agree to that without having to to have read anything but I agree I I know every time I was able to be altruistic I there's this surge of empathetic and and in in feeling well right Yi but uh perhaps in in the idea that you post here that idea of uh spiritual Evolution and this path that not only we are taking but also an entire planet our

athetic and and in in feeling well right Yi but uh perhaps in in the idea that you post here that idea of uh spiritual Evolution and this path that not only we are taking but also an entire planet our entire orb right this globe that we live live we're all becoming less material and more spiritual in our spiritual Evolution and that perhaps in this path of becoming more spiritualized uh we also are able to sacrifice meaning become closer to God excellent love that definition yes s the sacred becoming closer to God because it it does connect very well to to sacrifice and Joanna in the book plitude she even talks about how it's about like she mentions generosity starting small she's saying like in on chapter six she talks she on chapter six she talks about how starts with donating these material things you know objects utensils clothes food um Etc and then feelings you know and then your time and improving the art she mentioned improving the art of serving until you can donate self right Joanna always always so good with the words you know in the end donating ourselves so first we build it just like with any skill anything that we're learning as we progress through our multiple lives starting small starting you know step by step gradually and that to the point where she say it's going to be the art of serving until you can donate yourself and I think that is that is super powerful and also connects with the what you're mentioning about the sacrifice sacred being closer to God and closer to all this these Apostles and to our to Jesus our master in everything that he sacrificed and everything that he donated yeah I I was thinking just now I don't know if it makes sense so we're going to free form here right just uh I I call this not fully baked uh Food For Thought uh recently Yi I actually watch a series um I think it's Apple TV series uh becoming you I don't know if you have seen it it's really interesting I highly recommend everyone because it's a short uh series on the first 2,000 days of a

series um I think it's Apple TV series uh becoming you I don't know if you have seen it it's really interesting I highly recommend everyone because it's a short uh series on the first 2,000 days of a child and how the child evolves right so it's each step of the way from zero to about five years of age okay and one of the things that uh um it it talks about is the fact that by year two we now for the first time and of course he doesn't say on your second universe but around the time that child that was completely the self-identity right was completely immersed in the identity of the parent usually the mother as one one being you you cannot right me from the from the mother but at some point that and and in in the series it talks it's just quite well put where a baby is walking a two-year-old right walks with a mother and they look at this wall that is a mirror and they say baby mama baby so it's a baby it's not me it's the baby and the mother it's recognized but at some point right there's this magic that occurs that the baby finds this self-identity but haha with the me a person an identity comes also this entire slew of unanticipated consequences of the so-called terrible twos right it's me me me me it's my my my I don't know how to share I cry about everything it's all about me and of course from a psychological perspective we're talking about the beginning of the egoic construct that is key in the psychological maturity that the child will go through in in many different stages beyond the terrible TOs and uh my my thought was at some point the child overcomes that need to uh put everything in the world of me to become now the world of us right about five four years old the the the social behavior the immersed in in in a in a social ecosystem if you will and and I'm thinking Yi that perhaps this is us this is where altruism giving right giving something at a cost to you to another complete stranger uh and becoming sacred right become closer to the Divine we're also

inking Yi that perhaps this is us this is where altruism giving right giving something at a cost to you to another complete stranger uh and becoming sacred right become closer to the Divine we're also demonstrating the uh in that metaphor that I'm no longer the child that is in my my two-year-old self-absorbed but now I am now able to understand the ego as well as the self capital S right which is the spirit nature of who we are what are your thoughts I think it's a good parallel that you bring because I can also think of spiritism if you're mentioning something more related with psychology but if we think about spiritism all the the orders of spirits and all of that like how we're progressing in our spiritual journey and we're infants basically like we are we're still very young and still very you know flawed and we're still learning so many things when we compare to those spirits that have billions of years already the you know Spirit like Christ for instance and all of those things so we are very immature in that way so yes we're these stages are interesting because you can't have a society without having the me but you first need to have the me but then this egoic state that you're talking about this differentiation between I'm part of my I'm an extension because the baby thinks their extension of the mother yeah to I am my own person but now it's like everything revolves around me me me me this this this but then after some point there's this transition where now it's us and making the parallel with like this microcosm of a couple of years in the in the span of a human life with who knows how many thousands of years and and hundreds of thousands of years who knows in the life of a spirit of an immortal spirit it's it's an interesting parallel because we can also see how we evolve from you know from this unification to this individuation to the me and then to the the law of society and how it's important you know to to Foster those things and the idea of the altruism I think ties very well with

m this unification to this individuation to the me and then to the the law of society and how it's important you know to to Foster those things and the idea of the altruism I think ties very well with that so I think that's it's a good idea you have you have baking there let let's cook it together but tell me a little bit about uh because you said that Jo the angel in her book plitude which by the way uh it's the third book in her 16 book series of the psychology collection right but in that book which to me it's probably one of my favorites by the way uh she she brings that that idea of uh uh the components of alrais including start small it's okay right all in time you don't need to to uh become a super altruist and donate your right but but you can do uh other things such as uh starting with look look what you have look at your material uh items do you do you need that I don't know I'm just getting here but do you really need that uh bag that you bought in 19 uh 75 and you used once in 50 years right do you really need that so it's just just this idea that maybe we need to look at our things our possessions and uh and give whatever we can and then moving on into that Continuum until you're able to give her yourself but I really would like if you could talk a little bit about what it is to give of yourself are there any aspects that uh perhaps Joan or you in your studies can talk about this is an example of how I can and be altruistic by giving myself to the other I I think so because you know in it's interesting you mention the gradual process you know that that she talks about in the book because often times we we try to to have two lofty goals and the idea you know everything is is we we build these these skills we build these practices little by little so it starts with maybe like you said find a cloth that haven't used in six months that's the cut off in my in my household if I haven't used something six months it's going to be donated because I if I haven't used in six month I Pro I

d find a cloth that haven't used in six months that's the cut off in my in my household if I haven't used something six months it's going to be donated because I if I haven't used in six month I Pro I probably don't need it it's an excess so find what's an excess first remember the means motive and opportunity having that means if I have something that in ex that is in excess here maybe it's lacking for someone else the material piece you know could be could be money could be monetary could be material could be also time a lot of people have a lot of time that you can donate 10 minutes talking to someone sending a message of Love sending doing a prayer this is something when I think of altruism I think if there's all these little things and different things we can do that are going to help someone else a prayer coming from the heart really connecting with God we know the power of the thought we know the power of the prayer through spiritism through Christian teachings maybe just doing a prayer for someone is a way to start small but already you know having a meaningful impact so can I can I can I add something yes yes my invitation here is to pray for stranger even better right but uh but before you pray to that stranger look that stranger in the eye without him or her knowing that you're doing that to me uh who are the invisible ones the the homeless the people that serve you the I don't know the the person who's helping with the traffic or serving at the restaurant just look at that Perfect Stranger look in the eye as in saying I see you and pray for that person at a different time it's I think it's a wonderful way to to do that excellent excellent tip I think people should Heed These because it it's definitely it's something small and something that doesn't remember we said it comes at a cost the only cost that's associated with that is time so for for somebody to you know set aside maybe like five minutes of their day to do a heartfelt prayer for someone they don't

said it comes at a cost the only cost that's associated with that is time so for for somebody to you know set aside maybe like five minutes of their day to do a heartfelt prayer for someone they don't know five minutes who doesn't have five minutes so it's about I think again practicing because that's that's what's going to make it ingrain in us and and then we can we can be really altruistic by doing these small things that she talks about and and to comment on the second thing you mentioned about the different aspects of Joan on the book that she mentions um there's this gradual process and you mentioned like it is she says until you can donate yourself and one thing she says that I think connects really well with this is in the book she says that um lose to to is it's a it's a healthy strategy he says to lose what is small now to gain permanent results of significant value later to lose use what is small now to gain significant sorry permanent results of significant value later it's the same thing we mentioned about the treasures you know like not having these Treasures here on Earth but in heaven so like accumulating these things that are really going to take us to the next level spiritually and being altruistic is definitely you know the charity and all of that is definitely one one of those things that are going to help us there and I think it it when we're talking about donating ourselves that's what that's what I think this is about is it's about accumul losing something that's small now perhaps you know material things or time or whatever that may be to lose something of significant value that is permanent afterwards so when we donate ourselves we think of all these these uh Spirits like Mo Teresa like all these piku you know D like all these people that really donated themselves for others for a cause for other others you know so I think that that's that's the connection and that's a great bridge that she makes in the book and specifically that chapter six that

ted themselves for others for a cause for other others you know so I think that that's that's the connection and that's a great bridge that she makes in the book and specifically that chapter six that inspires us I think to to become more alistic to donate ourselves to eventually reach a point when we're serving and donating ourselves yeah and and for those of you who do not know Deval Deval Franco is the the medium the Brazilian medium that in partnership with Jonah the angels was wrote uh through his mediumship those those books but that's not the whole story dealdo is a a great disseminator he's been he devoted his life he's in his his late 90s mid90s 97 I think yeah 8 yeah still still working still traveling still inspiring people and in his charitable organization he I believe he provides meals to about 5,000 children every day three times a day um they do not only that but a plethora of uh services that those individuals in the area that he created the his organization um would have not any any other support uh so it's beautiful what he's done and the funny thing Yi is that that I don't know if you know this but he started all of this and this is what Joanne is telling start small but he started all of this when he was only 19 so I pause here to ask you who is listening to to this conversation what were you doing or if you're not there yet what do you plan to do when you're 19 I always think about it because for me on when I was 19 I was not thinking of any of this aspects of life I was thinking about myself I was thinking about moving on uh in life getting ready to to Embark in my adulthood and going to college and my whole life ahead of me but it was very self-centered still so love to to to have that as for us to think about it right and the fact that he didn't start when he was 19 giving us to 5,000 children yes yes correct correct right so so again you you have to start somewhere you have to start gradually yeah and the he's 97 I think today so when he was 19 it wasn't 5,000

9 giving us to 5,000 children yes yes correct correct right so so again you you have to start somewhere you have to start gradually yeah and the he's 97 I think today so when he was 19 it wasn't 5,000 children 5,000 mules that he was doing it was probably way way less or 10 maybe a handful you know but he started and he continued you know through his work through his persistence through his Al like developing this altruis behavior that we know comes already probably from other lives that he like he's acquired these you know this uh sacrificial know this self-sacrifice part of himself you know so it's but again for those listening it didn't it didn't start with 5,000 so think about he started small everything that we have that's grandio in terms of um you know we're talking shiko shave how many books has he you know Psy he started with one yeah you start with one message you start with one book yeah yeah and then you can continue through persistence you know yeah that's beautiful so on that aspect um let's talk a little bit about how patience can be a bit of giving ourselves in an altruistic Behavior absolutely great because she does bring of the the the idea of patience being extremely important and being the key um being a key component in altruistic behavior and I I I think we can look at this in many different lens one that it's interesting to think about patience is being patient I think with ourselves and with others as well but also waiting for things and being patient for things to develop you know we keep talking about this gradual progress and the persistence and necessary the resiliency patience is key behind that because otherwise if we don't have patience if we become impatient with trying to improve ourselves trying to improve others through altruistic acts we're not going to carry them forward we're not going to develop that habit develop that skill and patience is almost i' say like the the fuel behind the Machinery of altruistic Behavior because without it

not going to carry them forward we're not going to develop that habit develop that skill and patience is almost i' say like the the fuel behind the Machinery of altruistic Behavior because without it yeah you can't the machine is not going to work because you're just not going to reach all of that you can all that you can reach if you don't have patience and be kind to yourself as well as you're going you know in this in this journey of self-development through altruistic acts yeah can you can you give me uh this is going into your own personal interpretation of what patient is can you tell us perhaps a an example of how being patient um is an example of altruistic Behavior in of that higher level higher significance which is given yourself to the other what could be some examples there Yi I think a a good example of patience in in regards to altruistic behavior is understanding and truly exemplifying that through our actions that the the sentence they saying God's time I think a lot of the time especially nowadays in this frantic world everything everything is you know right now or or it's already too late you know everything is so fastpaced and we're becoming impatient and that that that little monster of impatience is growing with us because everything is is instant if we if we go on a website it doesn't load in three seconds internet's slow what is happening if we order something in the US even like on Amazon it's not here tomorrow what's happening like everything is fostering this this idea of this fastpaced environment but with the again I'm going to use the same term I used before the Treasures of the Soul like the true Treasures right they don't come like that and they often times more often than not they don't come when we expect them to come so the ultra being Al like altruistic I think the patient that's why I said it's the fuel because it's understanding and enacting the idea that we we are not in control of of of the things that we wish we were in control and there's God's

I think the patient that's why I said it's the fuel because it's understanding and enacting the idea that we we are not in control of of of the things that we wish we were in control and there's God's time things may we want may want things to happen at certain you know time I'm helping this person or I'm developing myself but I'm see still not seeing the results why is that I know this is supposed to have happened to yesterday but things come in God's time so I think the patient there patience there is something that is connected to the alteristic behavior through you know through this lens at least that's my interpretation or my take on on this yeah and my my thought thoughts would be that patience leads to um I know um in English may not be as impactful word as it is in Portuguese but resignation or acceptance right patience is is the idea that you're aware of what's going on but you accept that it may take a decade to get to to achieve something instead of that the opposite of it that instant gratification that we've become as a western Society so used to I love your example by the way of the the same day or the second day uh delivery and I have to tell you I I ordered something not Amazon and uh they said okay it's going to cost extra uh for immediate right so I said okay I will do that because I would like in two days right and well it took two weeks for them to ship so it was two days after shipped and it took to but it was never apparent to me or in my expectation and I was so upset so I was not very patient at all with that company that uh in a way provided me with information that was not as accurate or as tangible you know day and age right but what are the other uh aspects of giving yourself I'm thinking perhaps uh one idea is can be as simple as learning to quiet yourself right to listen to the other learn to um even when you are the star of the show if you will have the Shine the Light Shine in others that um supporting actors to to whatever you're doing um because you know that

sten to the other learn to um even when you are the star of the show if you will have the Shine the Light Shine in others that um supporting actors to to whatever you're doing um because you know that that person needs me more than you to to have the the the the light shining on them it it also maybe um has to do with uh just being there right you mentioned prayer and I I invited everybody to pray for somebody who has no idea you are praying for them but what are the other things that we can do that are at our fingertips but we forgot because of our life is so F so full of uh uh distractions and of UH responsibilities and worries on a daily basis that we forget to just Center and be able to as you're centered to to provide to give to give of yourself yeah I I great Point Marcia because I do believe too that patient is this forgotten virtue as as they mention the Gospel According to spiritism this forgotten virtue um that is so instrumental in jna uses this word instrumental you know patience is instrumental you know in in uh acquiring the the the goods for the soul the body like all of those things so it is it is such a pivotal thing that we often forget and I think for for being practical here definitely taking some time and setting aside sometime like we already mentioned to to pray but also sometime you know in in in in quiet and like in a quiet place just being with ourselves you know elevating our thoughts to God and just thinking of things and just basically slowing it down yeah to be with ourselves because nowadays I like I said the Frantic pace of everything and the demands and the worries but not only that the distractions as well because everything is achievable today you know like if you want to spend 12 hours a day in front of Television Entertain You you can you you actually can find things that are gonna keep you entertained for 12 hours if you're sitting down the couch and doing that so there's so many things you know like social media that's another thing

you actually can find things that are gonna keep you entertained for 12 hours if you're sitting down the couch and doing that so there's so many things you know like social media that's another thing too that it is it is so accessible and it it is so inviting and it it plays with things in our brains that we are not even even aware and those things they can deviate us from the the actual goal and they can distract us from working on our patients and being more patience patient with ourselves with others you know and trying to understand things around us in in a deeper way yeah there is um there is a book um written by canaman is his last name um I think the title is slow Thinking Fast Thinking Fast thinking slow thinking do you know Canon I think or something yes yes yes and and and it's a very interesting book because uh Kenan brings us this idea that uh our brains the fast brain that fast based brain is really for support on the fear-based type things support you from things coming to get you but for you to really rise up as a with the glories of humanity it really requires you to slow down and and there are many too many examples but one example that he he brings that is easy to comprehend is uh just multiply Yi multiply 355 times a, U 899 right and we got who yes you can't you just need time so for us to do things that Acquire uh that require sorry requires us to to to to Really flourish in all of our Humanity we need to learn to slow down and social media unfortunately it's the thief that uh steals from us right it steals our time it steals our brain steals our attention our ability to focus and uh so let's just from a patience perspective let's learn to be patient and let's be patient with ourselves even as we say I want to be on social media but not today or let's put 1% decrease in time use the fality right let's just try to be patient with ourselves as we become better but uh yudi we are at time I can't believe that we already spent all of our time talking

's put 1% decrease in time use the fality right let's just try to be patient with ourselves as we become better but uh yudi we are at time I can't believe that we already spent all of our time talking because time just went by super fast and I wanted to to ask you this right we we talked a little bit about uh Pope Francis I'm a fan and uh he he really um discusses the idea this contemporary life right this is dayto day and our craziness our distractions social media media and many other types of things that are here making our life not so easy and he said that that Samaritan the Good Samaritan is the Prototype of the fraternity and social friendship that creates the culture of encounter and build bridges of Love among all so I love to hear from you but I part today with the idea let us all base our our uh role model in that Good Samaritan that practice that act of altruism that uh not only stopped his so he robbed of his time right he stopped from his journey and uh picked up uh that man on the road that was naked and and unconscious put on his horse that means that he did not have a horse to drive on went to an in and uh treated the wounds and asked for the inkeeper to as he paid to take care of him until he could return and I love that are we ready to stop and pay attention so it goes hand in hand with that idea of patience and and empathy so want don't you have your final words before we say goodbye today Yi absolutely great example I think the the what Pope Francis said to in the paradigm and thinking the Samaritan also said that if he needs more he's going to come and pay so like he he really goes the extra mile and it's such a good example of the cost that were associated with that act and for us to you know talking about altruism from the psychological standpoint connecting with the the spirit is standpoint and all of those things I think it's the my final words would be to encourage you know people to reflect to be more patient with themselves with others and that in

ng with the the spirit is standpoint and all of those things I think it's the my final words would be to encourage you know people to reflect to be more patient with themselves with others and that in itself is Charity already and at the same time remembering that it starts small start small start with five minutes when I do my lectures I always say people say I don't read anymore I say if you read one page per day in one year you have read you will have read a book 365 pages right yeah one page who doesn't have five minutes today so start small don't don't wait for big opportunities to have you know something um everything go right in your life life to start to exercise altruism because we have to start small we have to start gradual we have to start somewhere and I'll give a last piece related with psychology a lot of Studies have shown throughout the decades that altruistic behavior is infectious in the point that example is everything so the more we're engaging these acts and the more we're going to inspire people around us to actually do those things too oh love it well everyone I hope you enjoyed our discussion today on generosity charity altruism and how it may indeed help us achieve the well sense of well-being psychologically speaking emotionally speaking right and from a perspective of societal wellbe that we contribute to that so with that yudi thank you so very much for for being with me today see I see everyone next week bye everyone byebye