Ep 37 - What to Expect From Your Parents

hello everyone welcome to the psychology and spirituality a bridge to a better life discussion I'm your host Marcia trano and with me are Dr an fansa jar corod and N Sinclair hi everyone hi if this is the first time you are watching this podcast like program please note that our program the psychology and spirituality weekly talks are based on the works by Joanna deangeles they offer a safe space for us to talk to confront to compare to correlate to expand Concepts from a psychological lens and uh meeting them from a spirituality perspective so that we can get some insight tips or anything that can help us lead a better life in today's episode we'll address aspects related to family family Dynamics all things that uh we hear that are quite sometimes difficult for us to to grasp right parental complex we'll get to it in a few minutes but in any case before we start our conversation in Earnest I would like to thank the organization that're sponsoring today's program umy Brazil the TV monel Cino the international Spirits Council and the United States spiritist Federation make sure you hit subscribe if you haven't already done so and if you'd like to check out other channels check us out at spiritist do us also if you have any questions please do write them down so we can address them later today or in a future episode but I want to start today talking about the fact that there's a saying right that uh most of us have heard it says like father like son and uh when I listen to it my more superficial brain my very material physical biological idea of like father like son I go into this idea oh we're talking about heredity genetics biology but uh can we really generalize that is this even true so I'm bringing this to you guys can we talk about maybe similarities differences what we have in terms of behaviors prositions in other words what to expect from your parents an do you want to start this conversation yes hello everyone so it's a a very interesting uh conversation very useful

e in terms of behaviors prositions in other words what to expect from your parents an do you want to start this conversation yes hello everyone so it's a a very interesting uh conversation very useful for all of us for our families for fathers and mothers and sons and daughters uh because yes we are at um to a certain limit to a certain point influenced by our uh by our biology right our genetics we say that temperament is a part of um of our person personality and temperament is uh genetic you know it's um influenced by the genes so by our um genes and chromosomes that come from a father and mother uh however personality is not uh does not include only temperament includes character also that it's the way that we learn how to deal and develop we could say say roughly um uh ways of dealing with uh ourselves with interacting with the world right and um so we are very complex being and since we are uh born and the baby is born and even before that in in mother's womb uh we are very influenced by the environment emotional environment biological the nutrients that the baby receives and many other aspects so um what is important is that we when we arrive here to this world right when as the spirit is knowledge say when we reincarnate uh in this interaction with the environment and first we are interacting with Mother's environment right inside the womb and outside breastfeeding and all the and then with the father and the whole family brothers and sisters a grandmother's grandfathers so every everybody that comes later on but the the main thing is that the behavior of the parents and also of uh you know uh the other people that are involved with the the child the way they behave especially in the beginning the mother and then the father okay so uh the the child is going to form an inner image and in the unconscious we have been talking about the Consciousness and the unconscious so in the unconscious uh it will be formed an inner image of father and father but the inner image is not the

ge and in the unconscious we have been talking about the Consciousness and the unconscious so in the unconscious uh it will be formed an inner image of father and father but the inner image is not the father and the mother the person that they are right the persons that they are my father and mother they themselves have been a child they have been an adolescent they have they are spirits also they bring to this life their own Heritage so but when the child arrives uh the child's going to be um dealing with mother and father in this in this moment in this life so in the unconscious uh is going to be form a image of mother and father what we call in psycholog the father and mother complexes because it's an inner image okay I think that's easier to understand and I always tell people the inner image okay as we seen it's not the person uh itself that it's my mother and and my father it's my own interpret ration my own perception of mother and father so this is very very important because since fraud and you know mothers are always G especially mothers and our fathers too are always feeling guilty for something oh I have done that I traumatized my child we are always feeling guilty I I was not good enough for this and that but we have to relax at a certain point we all love our children we want the best for them we are not perfect we are not going to be perfect mothers and fathers and we have to understand that the child is a spirit reincarnating and brings with um her or him uh brings everything that has that this Spirit has lived experiences how many mothers and fathers we have been right uh Sons and Daughters we have been uh in our past lives for instance so this is very important because the the inner image is going to be influenced by everything that happens to the child in this life okay as uh we have been talking previously and even by our genetics by our biology and also by traumas of course that we have and we are are at this point many times we're going to be

ild in this life okay as uh we have been talking previously and even by our genetics by our biology and also by traumas of course that we have and we are are at this point many times we're going to be traumatized for something okay um fights or this and that conflicts so the family dynamics that we are going to be talking but the more important is that we have to realize uh that we haven't been born in a certain family for no reason okay there is a reason and I'm sure sure Mars as you sat and will want to develop this so the first thing that I think we should think together is that uh the inner image that we make in this life of our father and our mother so the parental complexes will be influenced by all of this um all of these uh aspects of Our Lives biology environment um you know the the the Dynamics of the family the relationship with the mother and with the father but also uh it the spirit is there so the way that I'm perceiving the way that I'm relating to the image that I'm building in my unconscious of my mother and my father in it's my own responsibility oh can you can you repeat that can you repeat that that's such an amazing sentence go ahead so I think this is very very important because as I told you since Freud mothers are always feeling guilty for everything and fathers too but uh it's our personal responsibility the way that I perceive that I feel that I understand and that I create my inner image of my mother and my father and of course the child in the beginning say but the child uh in the beginning you know a small child doesn't have how to understand oh my mom is doing that because she has a conflict in this part or my father is stressed because of work of course the child is not going to understand you know and make this kind of reasoning and be able in that moment to understand in a sense of forgiving or you know even thinking in a rational way about things because the child the small child uh doesn't have uh abstract thought until around seven years old

moment to understand in a sense of forgiving or you know even thinking in a rational way about things because the child the small child uh doesn't have uh abstract thought until around seven years old okay the the pro thought processing is very Concrete in the small child so if the mother is angry uh she will think or he the child will think that uh she or he has done something really bad and not reason oh my mom is like this or that because she's stressed with my grandmother or my father or whatever but we shouldn't uh that's what I wanted to point out that the spirit is there from the beginning even if the spirit is not so active in a sense that we when we uh reincarnate we forget in a sense Consciousness cannot hold the ego Consciousness cannot hold all the memories of past lives right because we are evolving we are learning and so we forget things forget so uh we forget a lot of things but as Yung and especially Joanna J says the spirit is there always so deep inside the unconscious there is a higher Consciousness and that bring this higher Consciousness brings all of the ideas related to being a mother and a father and a CH and a son or daughter because we have been many many past lives so what I wanted to talk to you in this beginning of our conversation is that uh the child child in the and Freud Freud didn't say that Freud said that we were like um uh we were totally caught by uh biology we you know and by um by the traumas in our childhood by The Experience emotional experience and that was it but what I always say is that Freud forgot in a sense or he couldn't deal with that about the spirit in his equation so the wonderful things that Yung helped to you know bringing the idea of um a higher Consciousness within that Yun called self with capital S within deep inside the unconscious in uh related to the collective unconscious that Yung says calls uh but Joanna comes and says Yung self is the spirit so the spirit is here it's not there in the spiritual Dimension okay maybe uh he is there and

ed to the collective unconscious that Yung says calls uh but Joanna comes and says Yung self is the spirit so the spirit is here it's not there in the spiritual Dimension okay maybe uh he is there and he or she and here at the same time this uh uh we make divisions because we need for the ego to understand but what is important is that the spirit the knowledge of the spirit even if it doesn't manifest itself in Consciousness in the beginning of Life childhood adolescence uh the important thing it is there so the way that we are going to uh create this inner image in this life of mother and father not only is related to traumas to biology to the environment but is also uh related to this knowledge of the spirit so we are the ones we we see nowadays small children talking in a way that is like the spirit understand that the mother uh the ego doesn't understand that the mother is upset with something else it and it is just being angry with the child because uh the mother has a lot of other problems and conflicts but many times we we see small children that doesn't that the the child doesn't even have uh abstract thinking and is saying oh no mo mother everything is going to be fine where does this come from right so that's the spirit so let's relax in the sense and understand that the spirit is there in our beautiful children and then we can trust that they can in a sense understand sometimes when we do things that uh make us angry or are upset or this and that and don't feel so guilty all the time uh that's I think it's for this stud I don't know is that complicated or it's okay it's I I think it's awesome right so just to recap as I understand uh Freud um is the father of psychology says yeah like father like son referencing not only genetics but also trauma and then Yung brings up uhoh beyond that there there's uh the collective unconscious the uh individual unconscious right and also that uh the spirit and then Joanna brings in and says well beyond that it's not Spirit

ings up uhoh beyond that there there's uh the collective unconscious the uh individual unconscious right and also that uh the spirit and then Joanna brings in and says well beyond that it's not Spirit out there Yung but it's you the self with a capital S you are the spirit right you're the connect contion and so I think it's really cool that historically speaking we have some definitions of what we gain from from our heredity if you if you will but I think uh you mentioned something that uh in in talking about Spirit now we discuss what about what we bring as a spirit that has multiple existences meaning we reincarnate so I'm just going to say uh an or Jada do you want to say something about uh uh how is that from your perspective what do you understand about uh a senten that in uh in mentioned right that uh uh do not feel guilty uh mother or father because your child chose to be here with you something like that so who who would like to to add before we keep going yeah I'm happy uh I always joke here when uh when I was a community nurse visiting families with newborn babies I used all go around people the new parents with their newborn baby they're sort of sitting in all looking at think what shall we do you know so many tasks that you need to learn to do and I say look your baby has chosen you I say the stalk hasn't dropped the baby at the wrong address this is the right baby for you so whatever this baby presents with you've got it because if not he would have been born in a different house people say well she's a she's a strange nurse but just throwing the idea around that say that your babies come to the right address you are the right parents H and this baby is the right baby for you that doesn't mean it's all going to be perfect but it means that the challenges and the the presentation for each other is what we need because we need this dynamics of uh of difficulties sometimes in order to grow and develop if we don't if we don't have something to push against you know we can't build our

each other is what we need because we need this dynamics of uh of difficulties sometimes in order to grow and develop if we don't if we don't have something to push against you know we can't build our strength so it's it's this pushing and giving that we all interact but learning to love overcome because when you live 247 with someone you're just G to have to learn to love one another because not life is going to be quite difficult I think I I say it in G I know that there are families where things are really complicated and difficult but we are spirits that we do uh choose in a way even under guidance let's say of higher spirits of which family that we are already connected to mostly these are spirits who are our father our mother there are spirits that we've lived with before so we are all coming in and and having it's almost like a play in which we're playing the different characters now it's my turn to be Queen and now it's your turn to be the peas and next time around so that we all have all chances to develop all our aspects because each experience allows us to develop particular areas um and one of the things that is also thinking even our body is not Lottery it's not chance oh because my mom had this chromosome and my dad had does chromosome so yeah I ended up like this bad luck no it's it it is there is a reason why your body is exactly as it is it presents as part of the needs of the spirit that imprint in itself as well as the biology so even if we don't have the answers we don't know of our past we might have glimpses or ideas of this and that we have no idea of the whole of our past it doesn't matter what matters is this experience now and this now is the best time in the best family although we might find some people in our family difficult they might find us difficult H but we we are put together because we have a great great opportunity of developing and just going back to the guilt of parents one thing that H sometimes we were talking before I say sometimes children even as

are put together because we have a great great opportunity of developing and just going back to the guilt of parents one thing that H sometimes we were talking before I say sometimes children even as adults they can be very judgmental about their parents oh because my dad didn't do this my mom didn't do that or they didn't support me or they didn't blah blah but then when you become a parent you go wow I see my mother with different glasses now I realize how hard work you is to give guidance to do everything for a newborn so somebody's done it for us when we come in and even if it's not our biological family maybe if we've been adopted or if we' been brought up by another family member it's that person that represents the mother and the father those people who did that job for us but we've come in somebody does everything for us we grow up and then somebody else comes along and our children grow up and then they have to to repeat the pattern and there is reason in everything that is divine so it's a time for this and a time for that as the Bible already says so says at the time I did my best we're not perfect and nobody's asking for Perfection but just to awaken that Consciousness and say okay this is challenging me what's my lesson here how can I do this differently because if this is turning up in my life this is something that I need to deal with as uncom comtable or or difficult as it might seem at the time but once we are able to unravel it a bit and look at it as the American Native American Indians let in spirit they come a lot in England say fly like the ego have that wider view like if you're flying from the sky and you're looking at your life like that then you're not caught up in the NR of it you have that wider View and you can say okay let's try let's try something different to get a different result this time awesome thank you an before uh because I would like for an I'm sorry an to to Really um discuss guilt as as an brought up why we feel guilt and you mentioned Freud uh Le LED

different result this time awesome thank you an before uh because I would like for an I'm sorry an to to Really um discuss guilt as as an brought up why we feel guilt and you mentioned Freud uh Le LED in his thinking this tremendous notion of guilt for parents but I'd love to hear from Jada maybe J um we can talk about what does spiritist body of work talk about that uh uh reincarnation planning per se right how come uh and and maybe where can we go to find more references to discuss this idea of you are the stock drop you in the right family the right place at the right time yeah Mar um of course in the spiritual literature uh we have so many book books so many citations that talk about this uh reincarnation and actually if we Google that there are thousands and thousands of book from other philosophies as well and Joanna deangeles mentions this quite often always uh reminding as like anai was saying in terms of um you know us being an immortal spirit and Immortal in this case uh under the lens of spiritism it it doesn't mean just one life and that's it and then you you you keep just living on the spirit realm or whatever uh so it means all incarnations and I think when I think about Incarnation and the aim of reincarnation which is um for our inner Improvement is not just self acknowledgement because self- acknowledge is easy I mean okay we we're not go that far saying that it's that that easy right especially before a psychiatrist here but considering the second part of the package which is self- knowledge and inner transformation the inner transformation is the hard part so we are here not only to to you know to learn more about ourselves but once we learn more we learn more about you know Immortal Life reincarnations will have to deal with life with the time we we have here differently so being one of the my uh possibility of having relationship with people that are going to help me in this process that somehow were connected with me and previous life and then um and um well we have

so being one of the my uh possibility of having relationship with people that are going to help me in this process that somehow were connected with me and previous life and then um and um well we have to kind of adjust just our relationship our emotions toward each other and this is what happens in the family you know when we were talking about parents children uh we we are not here by chance and not even in terms of the body like an was talking about of our genetics but you brought something so uh I mean it really triggered something in me and I when you said that and I thought oh my God this can be the solution for reconciliation between parents and children you know Sons and Daughters uh which is um when we bring those traumas right that comes from uh our early childhood and adolesence and all of that when we are living and retaining those memories quite often we are doing that out of a context like you said oh my mother screamed with me and um see she exaggerated I mean I just didn't put my glass you know in the sink or something like you know so very silly and then uh it seemed like the end of the world but I'm just seeing like a snapshot of a situation and I don't see what triggered you know a reaction a stronger reaction and this is what I keep in my memory and like an was saying I think the more we mature the more we had we have time for us to reflect about life like for instance just this week in my therapy session oh my God right I I mean it's so incredible I was thinking my grandmother became a we wiow when she was 27 years old and because she married at 14 and 26 27 my father was just 11 and then I start thinking about you know how hard it was for my father they had to change move to a different city and all of that and I mean and I never thought about it my God she was just 26 27 when she was a widow with two young boy voice a and so now thinking about that and reflecting about her although you had a wonderful relationship I I can even give her more value I I can even understand certain

as a widow with two young boy voice a and so now thinking about that and reflecting about her although you had a wonderful relationship I I can even give her more value I I can even understand certain you know the way she was Sometimes some of the reactions and I think that I I know maybe it's not possible because like you said and I we children adolescent sometimes these children not have the structure and the understanding of how deep they have to go into the scope but uh if we could on insisting on thinking do not take that out of context there must be a reason why you know people your parents behave to you in the way you behave and I think this is a a path to reconciliation instead of aggravation in relationships I love it thank you thank you just and and right love the the the points to to this discussion an do you want to to talk about this this path to reconciliation or or really understanding from a child's perspective what to expect from the parents meaning contextualize don't take for face value what are your thoughts no I think it's uh wonderful um exactly what an you and J said for instance when an says the right baby for the for you for the mother and J talks about reconciliation and inner transformation so I think Joanna and the spiritist knowledge okay it's so important especially nowadays that we are evolving there is um all over the world there is an expansion of consciousness happening and of course people will say well but we have so many conflicts all around the world but exactly because of that because we are able to uh do things like uh we are doing right now with a lot of people that are going to be watching us reflecting upon ourselves our family Dynamics our father and mother grandmothers grandfathers and our family history so when I think um not only about the child but Asen said that this baby is right is the right baby for you so we could expand and say this Spirit chose to come through you right in this family and in with uh the past uh the past history of this family

said that this baby is right is the right baby for you so we could expand and say this Spirit chose to come through you right in this family and in with uh the past uh the past history of this family because there is the family Dynamic and some issues that we already know go through some generations right so since we know that the spirit chose and was chosen many times and there's a lot of work for a certain um Soul comes uh you know in that uh that moment that country in that family so what happens I totally agree with you guys that what happens is that uh this kind of empathy that you is saying when I realize uh that even in my Psychotherapy for instance or my meditations I'm able to connect to my mother and father to their own personal history to the history of my grandfathers and grandmothers you know you see how this inner transformation starts and not only in our Consciousness but also connecting everything our unconscious our spirit is like um the ego starts really hearing uh the the higher self let's say our our Superior Consciousness because the self with capital S as Janna says that it's is the spirit the spirit knows what uh it came here to do to which transformation it uh you know he came here or he she whatever came here to to try to do to try to make so the thing is that uh it's beautiful when we think that the family is together and with that special special Dynamics even if it you know it's hurtful in the in the the beginning because we know there are families with love lots of conflicts right but it's not without purpose that I think it's so beautiful when and said the right baby for you because and we can expense saying the right spirit and we are spirits as said that comes together in a family with a specific Dynamic and experiences right uh even traumas okay that we are going to experience together and try to change together but how do we change with understanding with love and understanding and good willll to do as J said to try to understand who is this

that we are going to experience together and try to change together but how do we change with understanding with love and understanding and good willll to do as J said to try to understand who is this being that is my mom who is this being that is my father what's their their history for instance what happened to them so then I can understand uh how I came to the world what was uh the dynamics of the family when I uh arrived you know and um okay and so how did I suffer uh uh the the Dynamics how I felt uh which uh were my and are my inner images because the when the when we are talking about complexes we are talking about our inner world so it's my responsibility it's not other people's even my mom my dad it's not their responsibilties because it's my inner world of course so this is all uh very important that we remember but I wanted to bring something else to our talk that we have um the spirit's telling us that however family Behavior influences the conduct of the reincarnating person um who become uh influenced let's say right by the family Dynamic according of course to the level as we are talking the level of evolution and awareness of the spirit that is that is reincarnating but what I wanted to bring and because we were talking about guilt right yes and you asked me about that so so the conflicts the family Dynamic and I would love to hear and an and you uh Mars about that the vibrations because we are talking about spirit so the vibrations of the family Dynamic all of this will profoundly influence the behavior of the the personality that the child is taking okay so when we talk about guilt I think there is a guilt of that ego that it's the mother or and the the father but also now I'm putting another another factor to this equation but also the father and mother are also Spirits learning here the reconciliation that just said but the the thing is that if they themselves are not aware of this and they think they are only uh how they know themselves the ego the

are also Spirits learning here the reconciliation that just said but the the thing is that if they themselves are not aware of this and they think they are only uh how they know themselves the ego the personality and then they don't understand anything about uh the unconscious and about uh us being Spirits Immortal Spirits bringing all of our heritage and things that we decided to experience so if they don't know all anything like this they are certainly going to project onto the child a lot of their are conflicts or problems right and this could influence and behaviors this could influence um as the spirits tell us the vibration of the family is the is going to be a certain vibration could influence the behavior of the child the Adolescent so this is another also point of view so I don't think we should uh we should forgive ourselves because we are spirits learning we should like an said be we should relax that uh our children are the children that we accepted and that we have UH responsibilities towards them they have towards us because it's all this family Dynamic but we also should pay attention to what it's our shadows we have been talking about that our own conflict so we don't project onto the the child our sons and daughters and don't uh you know we really can achieve uh this um growth together this inner transformation together because otherwise maybe uh the guilty that you were asking me Mara could really get some roots in our unconscious if especially if the spirit knows our higher Consciousness that we are not trying really you know hard to change things in ourselves and we are projecting onto others yeah if if we if we go back to the spirit's literature they they really emphasize as just s said just look out reincarnation and there's thousands and thousands of books about it but joah theangel specifically the body of work the the the many books that she has written uh it it brings not only only the psychology in life but also the impact of previous life but I I I just wanted

joah theangel specifically the body of work the the the many books that she has written uh it it brings not only only the psychology in life but also the impact of previous life but I I I just wanted to emphasize to everyone who's listening here uh we chose right I chose you father and mother uh and the acceptance was also Mutual we we came prepared almost this and I'm thinking of you and this Nest that was carefully crafted to to be able to get you and help you with that inner voyage that inner transformation that comes with uh awareness and Consciousness but um it is not simple right just it's not as simple as one to one it's almost one to so many different variables and just to remind everybody what Anna just dropped us because if we were to di digress into defining those Concepts would spend several hours today but she talked about uh guilt Shadow complex what else and uh so there's a lot that we need to to understand but the the main word here is acceptance acceptance is I and I I shine away from the word resignation right acceptance acceptance that we are here and despite the fact that uh those parental complexes and I think when we talk about that just to to confirm understanding an what we're talking about is the inner image that we all carry about what it is to be a father what it is to be a mother and while it is what I bring as a human being right as a spirit it may shift and reshape within my lifetime and the lifetime of a societ of a of a planet in itself so it is it is fluid it is complex but I think what we're saying here is let us be accepting and focus on those reconciliation especially when the family Dynamics are not so easy right so I just want to say uh I would love to hear from each of you uh uh a minute or two before we close on what are the thoughts that came to your mind as we discussed this idea of uh our parental as parents relationship with our children but our parental relationship with our own parents okay I I just want to say just before we came in this meeting this

e discussed this idea of uh our parental as parents relationship with our children but our parental relationship with our own parents okay I I just want to say just before we came in this meeting this afternoon I was reading from the book the psychology of gratitude by and I just want to leave my last thought is He suggests to live in the Family Practice gratitude and if you can practice gratitude in the family you can then practice gratitude in society and in that way we change the world love it thank you an beautifully said I heard once uh someone that said that uh our children are not the size that we want they are the size that they are but I was remembering in terms of you know this guilty that uh an was talking about that my my son was really really very well behaved when he was young I mean really really good and and quite often people would come you know surprised saying oh my God uh how well he he he does behave and uh congratulations and that I would always say the same thing listen it's 5050 remember that one he's misbehaving as well is what he is what he brings and 50% is the you know the education uh you know what we are you know with more than than with words with Al examples what we are trying to teach him so it's 5050 and I think in this in terms of uh you know feeling guilt after we we always have to remember that just do your 50% and then you can you can be at peace right that's awesome thank you thank you so much J and do you want to wrap it up with some words of wisdom regarding uh parental uh relationships and uh maybe what we as as kids not as parents but what do we as kids need to to to to remind of ourselves of our own parents yes I think uh as an said and also uh we are sharing experiences as um children sons and daughters and as parents we are sharing experiences here in the and learning together exactly has and said psychology of gratitude that Jah Jen say so gratitude is Love In Action and if we learn how to be grateful to our parents even when they

eriences here in the and learning together exactly has and said psychology of gratitude that Jah Jen say so gratitude is Love In Action and if we learn how to be grateful to our parents even when they haven't been so great let's say and if we learn how to understand our inner child because we also have an inner child the memories and feelings and um experiences that we have had as a child as a son or daughter are within ourselves they are also a complex in the complex of the child within ourselves so if we understand that and we remember that we are here to grow together to make this inner transformation as just said and that we can trust that we are here uh in the end to learn how to love one another and especially uh it's a beautiful experience uh that we leave when we are we have a family doesn't matter how the family is constituted but we have somebody being uh in the in the role of a father father of a mother and of of the children okay so we are learning with each other and if we can be grateful as an uh remembered us reminded us that if we can be grateful in the family for the opportunity of this beautiful experience of learning sharing experiences and learning together then we uh we can be grateful um to the human family to be here with everybody and I think this is very very important nowadays that we really understand that we are a a small family learning together and a bigger bigger family in humanity that we are here all of us for a reason and this basically is how to understand ourselves as part of of a home of what we call the Creator right the Transcendent one the unity and that we are a bigger family and we are learning together and learning how to love so this is I think it's uh basically uh what I would uh point out I'd love to to leave a few words because somebody gave me a wonderful book and it's not about psychology and it's not about spirituality but here it goes a British uh artist illustrator um I believe his name is Charlie mckasy he wrote the book I don't

ave me a wonderful book and it's not about psychology and it's not about spirituality but here it goes a British uh artist illustrator um I believe his name is Charlie mckasy he wrote the book I don't know if any of you have seen um the boy the mole The Fox and the horse and I just want all of you to leave the message of the book uh that has recently been made into a movie uh which is love love and embrace the the boy as your inner child with so many questions so many insecurities so many you know and playfulness and acceptance so uh for all of us here for all of you who are watching us I hope you have uh had a wonderful time talking about our complex Dynamics with our parents and our children and hope to see you next time thank you so very much