Ep 20 - Psychology and Spirituality | Self Condemnation

foreign welcome to the psychology and spirituality a bridge to a better life discussion I'm your host Racino and with me is my co-host josara corn God jasara is the Secretary General of the international spiritus Council and former president and current Vice President of the United States spiritus Federation for the past 30 years josada Korn gold has been volunteering as a counselor in fraternal conversations in several spiritist institutions thank you so much for being with me for joining us in this live talk and I want to say that the psychology and spirituality program is sponsored by Ernie Brazil United States spiritus Federation and the international spiritist Council make sure if you haven't done so yet hit subscribe and if you'd like to check additional information check our Channel at www.spiritus.us and I want to say to you if you this topic is of Interest we highly recommend let me bring to everyone our references today uh we highly recommend this books by Joanna DeAngelis with a collaboration by divaldo Pereira Franco uh finding peace and health existential conflicts Jesus in our days and the conscious being as we keep moving uh you wanted to to say that if you want to acquire any of these books please go to layout publisher spiritus books at www.lialpublisher.com it's so good to have you with me today to discuss this topic which is a a bit difficult to discuss right self-condemnation and uh just want to say that previously we discussed how important it is for us to know ourselves to accept as we are and implicit in what you're called the call to action uh that is given to us by Joanna DeAngelis we we understand that uh as part of that process we sometimes have this overwhelming sense of feeling guilt as a matter of fact this topic is so important so important that you find reference to it in most of Joanna de Angela's books Beyond those that I showed to you if you were to come to my desk you could see my goodness is so many books it is it looks like a

tant that you find reference to it in most of Joanna de Angela's books Beyond those that I showed to you if you were to come to my desk you could see my goodness is so many books it is it looks like a bookstore with so many references that we discussed today but obviously due to the abundance of the material in the importance of the topic we will just touch the surface today more to come later before I move on I want to say josada do you want to say hello to everyone yes absolutely Marcia hello everyone hello to you that's a wonderful to be back for another episode of our podcast like um series of programs and um I'm really looking forward for us to talk about it it's uh every week has been a process of self-discovery uh every time we we have to dive into those uh texts the books the references that we have from Joanna DeAngelo is it has been it has been promoting growth and uh I I think it's so extraordinary when we open ourselves to this to new knowledge to a new approach to life to to not be afraid to look at ourselves and and really think that we are a working progress in process well but we are a working process and um and having this ability I think it's it's uh it's one of the main points of um this work that we are doing here together with you all and so we are very happy that you have you are able to join us and and tuning in each and every program that we are preparing with so much love to all of you oh thank you thank you for for saying hello and I just want to say the the basis of what we started to to discuss is found in the book Finding peace and health right and I just wanted to to bring to you because in that book Joanna you know references the analysis of the evolution of the human thought and uh basically goes from primitive pre-magical magical rational and intuitive so we have this abstract notion about your your thought process and to counter that this is good news by the way Joanna keeps bringing back that idea that I just had a alluded to that we all of us

ive so we have this abstract notion about your your thought process and to counter that this is good news by the way Joanna keeps bringing back that idea that I just had a alluded to that we all of us when we accept ourselves as we are we start to to access uh the tools to develop our own inner resources and with that we are equipped to grow we're equipped to to be able to acquire new qualities and we are able to really start to to go into that process of self-discovery the process of inner Enlightenment in the process of really um sinking to our aspirations right and this is done this is good news as I said before this is done without paying and without suffering right but uh we we keep on thinking about Joanna's uh text uh that we're discussing you today and she keeps saying right the behavior is one that should suggest that love is enlightened selflessness and I think this is so beautiful how can we all access this moment this feelings the sentiment and in it we find ourselves right it's this moment of self-realization that we do so with that I just wanted to to to say we're here to actually talk about the process of self-condemnation and and those two topics go hand in hand so I wanted to just open for us to to talk some more josanna what are your thoughts yes um the thing is um when we think about self-cam donation and uh think about ourselves as Immortal beings all the process that we you know from the beginning till now and what is about to come the first thing in terms of what you just mentioned about love could really really realize that our own existence is an act of love when we think about a Creator regardless of the name you you refer to this Creator when we think about a Creator when we think about you know the breath of life is is mostly mostly we are talking about a breath of love we are talking about an existence that was provided to us respecting us as individuals respecting our process to reach those several stages of involvement like you mentioned and you know the last one

we are talking about an existence that was provided to us respecting us as individuals respecting our process to reach those several stages of involvement like you mentioned and you know the last one being intuition but I'm sure when we reach there there is another level that we we don't even fathom yet what what it is right just for what where we are now and when we think about it when we think about uh all of this what we are like uh Children Of Love without exception right if for your Australia go straight or whatever we are children out of love we come to this process that along our experiences in terms of um you know evolving uh because of our free will because of the times because of everything that prevailed during those times the context of the times that we were living of course we we made wrong choices and the more we become enlightened to that the more those choices that are and and the actions and the reactions that it promoted are still engraved in in our see let's call it mind the mind of the the spirit the mind of the immortal being and we reach a point um basically where we are now that with a bit more of maturity not that much not that much psychological maturity but we this is what we want to do this is start becoming a burden to us and without realizing or even understanding why we are doing that we go into a process that even be begins before self-contamination itself which is the the lack of self-love because now there is something in me that awakens this evil feeling towards myself um kind of you know bringing remembrances without necessarily the details that there are there is uh dust under the the rock you know and we have to clean that dust to dare and we do not necessarily feel capable or do not understand exactly why do I have to do that and why things from so long ago it still make me feel like this and um Escape mechanism is for me to thank um I'm wrong I cannot belong I I I I don't deserve things and we get into this inspire uh of you know

things from so long ago it still make me feel like this and um Escape mechanism is for me to thank um I'm wrong I cannot belong I I I I don't deserve things and we get into this inspire uh of you know self-condemnation self-sabotaging sabotaging our lives and self-pity and it's a it's it's it it's so much more so what is Marcia what do you say yeah no you I agree with you so let's just uh back to the beginning right which is number one you and me and all of us here wanted or not we are Immortal beings so that's the first point which implies that upon this life and its death the Corporal death we continue living which means what we did before is part of our baggage if you will or our our I love the the idea that the the luggage that we we bring and we start to put our memories and all of that uh uh commitment for being responsible for everything we have done for everything that we have thought for everything that we have said and for everything that we decided not to do even though we wanted to do so there's a lot of responsibility right there and with it in it there's a sense of whoops I made a mistake and I think like you said uh it starts with that realization that comes with the process of self of self-awareness right those that uh have the courage to to self-reflect and and become self-aware is now confronted with our own mistakes and with when we look at our own mistakes we need to Now understand how do I fit in do I forgive myself do I even if I cannot forgive or forgive him from somebody else do I still love and I think it's all about that self-love that you're talking about and once we go through that then what do you do with this we're still responsible regardless of how we go about it we are responsible based on the laws of action and reaction for every Force Sir Isaac Newton said for every Force there is a one that goes against in equal force in opposite direction so this is this is that law that we regardless of how we want to to act upon our our commitments

Isaac Newton said for every Force there is a one that goes against in equal force in opposite direction so this is this is that law that we regardless of how we want to to act upon our our commitments and our responsibilities we have to go through but the problem here is that little thing called guilt that little thing called self-condemnation what you do with this right how do you manage this sense of you haven't done what you're supposed to do and this is quite hard as as we mentioned before this this process to which I believe you just mentioned we are here and we may not be my mature psychological but we are right we are no longer children we are this working process but as we are developing as human beings we we really need to understand what do I need to do what are the tools that I need to deal to be able to trigger this sense of self-acceptance and self-love despite the fact that we all make mistakes and I think I wanted to perhaps pause a little bit here just to talk about a a point that you that you brought why are are some things it right just not everything but some things that trigger a stronger reaction than others right maybe everything you have that uh the so-called the thick skin you can handle every type of conflict and then there is one person in your life and they just have to say ah and all of a sudden all your guilt sips through from within that sense of I failed and and I think we we can talk about Jose here about all that ancestral legacies right that we bring with us we can talk about from a psychological perspective of our unconscious archives we can talk about my goodness the expression of those legacies and those unconscious archives in terms of how they manifest into insecurity fear instability in those scape mechanisms that you talked about so let's talk a little bit how do we start here can we talk about perhaps in in The Reincarnation process that we we are here Life After Life the idea that we carry those ancestral legacies what are

t so let's talk a little bit how do we start here can we talk about perhaps in in The Reincarnation process that we we are here Life After Life the idea that we carry those ancestral legacies what are your thoughts yes sir you you brought so many good is the one responsible for that yes you know um to one of the the questions that you asked we can say that we have open wants so this is why some things bother more than others so we can state for sure and this is something that we have been mentioned a few times that we we are going through a process of progress and uh and today I am the best best version of myself so thinking from this perspective and going back in time analyzing history historical facts and uh everything that we have here on our planet we've played a role in many of those occasions that today we we look uh with uh you know saying that that was barbaric right but along the way um we had opportunities to remove let's say the holes of those you know the lack of knowledge the ignorance itself that led us to act in a certain way and we come to terms with that but not everything because we are just beginning this process of re-educating ourselves so there are open wounds uh facts that will trigger us into saying this is an area that you're still weak that you still you know use the self-condemnation and how bad I was or and and all this emotions come to surface and it becomes very difficult for us to deal with that I think the best way for us to deal with that like Joanna de angelis you know actually she she uses for title when this chapter exactly lack of self-love but to uh to uh to lead us to do exactly the opposite oh passion okay maybe it is still hard for us even to love ourselves Because deep inside I know um how many things there are to you know to do I have to own the my my actions the responsibility of my actions and this has been one one thing that I've been doing I'm going to share with you for quite some time now how to come to terms with all that with this history

y actions the responsibility of my actions and this has been one one thing that I've been doing I'm going to share with you for quite some time now how to come to terms with all that with this history with this uh ancestral memory that is more than a memory right we were active participants in all of this is um uh looking uh at other people not necessarily myself because sometimes we have to look in the mirror it hurts it hurts more so I will look for those uh you know people from the past that have a a very bad reputation and I started you know um using that methodology that Jesus would say you know before criticizing anyone go and walk in their shoes for a week in their sandals for a week so I start thinking about the whole context where those people lived and not not just saying if uh um it was me there uh how would I have act but uh but just thinking they are the byproduct of their times so to try to condemn people attitudes the actions that they did with the view that we have today right uh consider that they considering that they lived 500 years ago a thousand years ago two thousand years ago it's not fair not fair it's it's not uh having compassion having understanding so having said that okay um I'll have compassion in relation to others to important figures from the from the past but also in relation to myself which doesn't mean that I'm going to accommodate to what I am and saying okay at least I I have self-awareness already no I I mean I will be courageous enough to see my flaws and the invitation from Juana d'angelis here from my perspective right because you know there are so many angles for us to see is that she's inviting us not to linger on negative emotions that is the self-condemnation the self-pity or all for me everything happens to me but I know that it happens to me because uh I'm not I'm I'm a naughty person or because I for sure have done so many things in the past which is something that sometimes we do wrong as well we we keep on blaming the past

appens to me because uh I'm not I'm I'm a naughty person or because I for sure have done so many things in the past which is something that sometimes we do wrong as well we we keep on blaming the past without realizing that we are still doing those things today so here she's inviting us to look at the glass half full okay I'm just in the middle of my journey but I already did that and there is room for more things for more Improvement and not be there you know holding into those thoughts that I don't deserve somehow I know that things do not come my way because I'm bad I was bad I did things or uh you know blaming yourself too much even on the others so this is just you know some of the things that we could be talking now Mercy I don't know yeah yes no this is this is very good and I I appreciate that one of the things that I I wanted to perhaps for us to to talk a little bit during our time together is to maybe understand that uh some inner conflicts may take control of our our life right so we we are a walking zombie if you will we are just suffering as a result of those inner conflicts and the question here is why why do we have those things that we carry with us and we already mentioned so why do they happen well those that may be uh dormant right we we are Immortal beings so uh I I may carry a part of this baggage that I may carry is with me but I'm not really dealing with that it's all good it's in the back right it's it's a dormant it's hibernating but um when they start to to be awakened by whatever triggered I think you mentioned that little wound right there's something that Sparks the sense of of uh inadequacy the sense of hurt and when we look at it uh they come and they spark this this fire within that maybe we were not ready to deal with it yet and they start with this potential to take control of our lives and even our ability to deal with how we are uh from a psychological perspective so the question that I have here for us for both of us is why why

tart with this potential to take control of our lives and even our ability to deal with how we are uh from a psychological perspective so the question that I have here for us for both of us is why why are those dormant conflicts inside of us take hold of who we are and and it's it's all about having unresolved experiences in from our past lives right so I think when we talk about the the notion of reincarnation and Life After Life we talked about we are responsible for a lot of the things that we criticize today we were we are actors in that theater right we were doing something very very much uh likely that we've done that so the the question that we have is we are the best version of who we are today but somehow we know that we haven't always been there right we haven't always been the best version it's a an improbability and an impossibility so the question then what do we do uh our favor favorite uh psychologist Mr Young talks about this mask that we create to kind of hide our sense of inadequacy and whenever something is the trigger to losing that mask we lose our sense of very frail sense of peace and that's where the guilt plagues us so maybe we can talk a little bit about that uh we we you know our mask is is uncovered we we are shown or we feel exposed and then we awaken that enemy within ourselves can we talk a little bit about it and it's all in the process of self-awareness and self uh Discovery right just out of what I was thinking when you were talking is uh like we mentioned before and I'm one person that really believes in the Creator and that that uh we just receive it love from God from the Creator I believe this is an act of god of love as well uh while we do not have the maturity to deal with certain things that would be painful to us they they are kept hidden like you know we we normally talk about you know the different departments that we have in our brain even sometimes you know someone you know brings a book for you to read and you said oh my God this

like you know we we normally talk about you know the different departments that we have in our brain even sometimes you know someone you know brings a book for you to read and you said oh my God this is too much for me I'm just going to keep it now for now maybe after I grow a little bit I will be able to address this I think is the same thing when we are talking about this um uh inheritance that we have from the the the actions because even if we say like I'm I mentioned before you know to be compassionate and to to think about uh the contest of the time it doesn't mean just because I have let's say an excuse to say that what was what we knew that's what what we thought it was right to do at the time that that it it doesn't hurt or when I look at it today you know let's say a slave or a slave owner okay I may know that this is what what happened you know centuries ago but it's still if I see myself like one it's going to hurt anyway yes okay I may have like I said the the excuse so to say that you know this is what we knew but it it it's it's hard so it's difficult for us to deal with that like a child that you you know you start uh disclosing knowledge about life itself uh little by little right according to their maturity so I I I believe that the more and and since you we are mentioned about reincarnations and all that and all those process the more we leave the more we experience the more we grow the more we will be able to you know open some of you know those departments with little drawers that okay now I'm strong enough to eliminate that owning Edge you know looking for ways to um that will represent the opposition of what I did before now I'm going to be an Albert Schweizer some country and I was a slave owner but now I'm gonna look for exactly the opposite where I can do something good and and this is a I think a good example in the sense that it doesn't have to be something that is painful or that that you know like sometimes we just think about Karma as being a a bad thing it

good and and this is a I think a good example in the sense that it doesn't have to be something that is painful or that that you know like sometimes we just think about Karma as being a a bad thing it can be something that you know you become so selfless and so conscious of um what you have to do that you will dedicate yourself to uh eliminate the uh that thing those actions that were were there Lane dormant and in terms of the Persona sometimes you know to deal with our own selfies it's not just with the world I think it was just the world I know I wanted to show myself like you know you know like like the world like it's one thing but sometimes we do that as an escape mechanism as well I I I I I I use that mask so much that this is what I believe I am and as sometimes you know you preach so much let's say a virtue that not necessarily you already puts that but you mean that you have it but if it chases uh present themselves you will see that you are going to to act the opposite way of you know of what you you believed you already had conquered so it's it that's why you know what you're talking about psychology and combining the quality it's so much I think it's happening now exactly because of that right we're here because uh yeah now at least like I said we have to have the courage to to face those topics yes not from a negative perspective but from a positive way one it's not that I mean I I just walk at half of the road no I already walk in half of the road right and if I want the energy to do that until now I will have the energy to do whatever comes next so this is a positive way of looking and it's everything starts with this love with this self-love and it's stop just uh finding excuses that it's because I did something it's the self condemnation it's don't deserve or or uh people or in the case of self-pity people all going to love me if they see me very fragile and uh and and we we get accustomed to you know to act almost like vampires we feed on the energy of

or or uh people or in the case of self-pity people all going to love me if they see me very fragile and uh and and we we get accustomed to you know to act almost like vampires we feed on the energy of us you know uh that The Compassion around us is giving is giving and we forget that we we are our Pro our own source of energy yes we are right yes so so so back to what I was saying right uh the issue here is uh we we become responsible for um that self-condemnation right through self-criticism and really awaken the enemy within ourselves it's this the self-criticism can be so uh disempowering and that all of our thinking and our Behavior they become uh they become uh the target for us to crush ourselves down and it it can be truly destabilized into our emotional peace so it's it's very important when we look at this because we we need to to perhaps look at uh what is what it is very very very courageously look what it is that I've done and I must have done something right I I I I feel in a way that it's it hurts the guilt is expressed by self-criticism by self-animosity by really wage in a war within ourselves that everything I do I I go into self-sabotage and it leads us to this sense of failure that can be quite quite dangerous for our own sense of self so uh let's just be careful with with all that we bring because we are here and I'm sure you said you're going to say yes we are here to do this we're here to to really invite all of us to Embark in this journey of self-discovery self-awareness and all we're saying is let's do that also with self-compassion sort of self-gov forgiveness and self-love the lack of self-love can be quite traumatic to all of us what what are the some of the things as we come to to a close uh just that what are the things that come to your mind in terms of uh um our desire or our destiny if you will to to Really uh reach a state of uh plenitude a state of fulfillment and uh all the types of obstacles that come our way as part of the package

in terms of uh um our desire or our destiny if you will to to Really uh reach a state of uh plenitude a state of fulfillment and uh all the types of obstacles that come our way as part of the package called self-condemnation and guilt the way I see is um we are beings that we are always going to be in the direction of light okay so it's in nature in US um and somehow like we were saying about those traumas and uh these ancestral inheritance that we have we we understand that a in a way that refers to an aggression to righteousness that we promote yes okay because here there is no Creator or tribunal dare to punish you it's our own conscience and the more I become aware like I said before okay it was what they did at that time but it's still it is bad I wish I I I I I I I I would never repeat that and I I never ever done something like this so we but but uh this um it's inevitable you know it's it's a fate for us you know as Immortal beings to towards the light and because of that even when we delay ourselves in those traumas they are referent to our actions and also in in relation to the actions of others towards us sometimes you know we were so mistreated in other incarnations that now we we lack confidence in in in presenting ourselves to the world or a certain people people or sometimes you know people that we see people that have aversion to any kind of uh religious possibility and I normally say watch out because if you have such an aversion you have killed um yeah and and have have killed and have been killed no you have you know in the name of the of you know any kind of religion or or the church in this case so we bring all that but even when we are really down and when maybe we don't even have a chance uh at that moment to find a solution for ourselves um somehow a solution or Mercy will will reach out yes and that it can be person it can be a book it can be a live a podcast that you're listening to it can so many things that will give you that impulse to go in the direction that we are all

each out yes and that it can be person it can be a book it can be a live a podcast that you're listening to it can so many things that will give you that impulse to go in the direction that we are all going we're talking about the pursuit of happiness it's our message but more than right is our inner desire there's nothing more than that that we desire than to feel happy then to feel peace right and this isn't the direction we we're going so let us be merciful with us allow ourselves as well to you know to meet those circumstances that um uh aren't are are difficult for us to deal with by looking at ourselves but let us also be inspired to to go on and and to accept love ourselves be compassionate towards uh towards ourselves and just keep going and whenever necessary ask for help yes yes I think uh uh I wanted to just uh wrap it up with what you said so beautifully so thank you is if we if we want to to come to terms with how do we break the cycle right how do we start on from the uh self-criticism self-condemnation guilt and break it so that we can start back into the road of happiness and peace is just understand that it is inevitable it is inevitable that we will grow and through the laws of reincarnation yes the circumstances by which we find ourselves are perfect for us to meet the unpostponable recovery for our own soul meaning that we will find triggers that will lead us to some sort of conflict but let's look at each trigger as an opportunity to look back and and find the solution for that Eternal happiness to that Eternal growth that that sense of this is we are getting some breakthrough here and we are indeed achieving our happiness that's what I thought would be a good way for us to to end our talk today josara there is so much more that we can talk I said more to come and perhaps we have another time to to keep chiming away on the topic of guilt specifically but with that just started I want to say thank you for your time today thank you so much for your thoughts and you're

ps we have another time to to keep chiming away on the topic of guilt specifically but with that just started I want to say thank you for your time today thank you so much for your thoughts and you're right Diaz and we'll see you again soon foreign